The Livewire Guide to Going, Being and Staying Veggie

Juliet Gellatley

Chapter 22 – Friends or Foe

‘It’s funny, but when I went veggie I was worried about what my friends would think.’ If that’s how you feel, then you’re probably in for a nice surprise, Most young people can see that going veggie is a positive step that saves animals. This doesn’t mean that they’ll all want to join you, but at least some of them will already be heading in the same direction! Georgina Harris, 15, of Manchester remembers, ‘All my friends thought going veggie was really cool. And lots of people would say “Oh yeah, I’m a veggie too” even if they weren’t!”

Of course, you’re bound to come across some drongo who’ll make pathetic attempts at teasing you for your beliefs. ‘Rabbit food – that’s all she eats’; ‘Aaah, here comes the little bunny lover’ are about as intelligent as the comments get. Often the reason they do it is because you show them up. It takes courage to be different and you’re showing these people that you’re strong and they’re not – and that worries them.

Be prepared for the macho rubbish. Leanne Smith, 16, got really fed up with a friend of her father’s.
‘He was always having a go at me about being too emotional and not living in the real world. He used to call it teasing and although he had a smile on his face when he did it I know it wasn’t meant to be funny – it was spiteful. He was trying to make out that because I was female I was weak or something.
He used to go shooting a lot and one Sunday afternoon he called in to see dad and just threw a dead rabbit down on the kitchen table in front of me, laughing. “There’s a nice little furry bunny for you”, he said. I was so disgusted that for the first time I told him, in no uncertain terms, what I thought of him but without being hysterical. I think he was shocked. Certainly my dad was and I don’t think he’s seen the bloke since.’

There’s a lesson in Leanne’s story. Whatever you do, keep cool! It’s only fun taking the Mickey if you get a reaction. It won’t take long before everyone gets used to you being veggie, then jokes become boring and stop.

The biggest reaction you’re likely to get is one genuine interest. The number of veggies in Britain and many other countries is sky-rocketing, so be ready for questions such as, '‘What do you eat?'’ Joanna Bates, 12, of Northampton says 'At first my friends kept asking me if I missed meat -–until they decided they preferred my food to their own. Also they started to associate meat with a dead animal and in the end four out of five have also become vegetarian.’

Some would-be veggies give up because all their mates want to meet at the local burger bar. That used to be a problem once when there was no veggie alternative and even chips were cooked in beef fat. It shows just how strong veggie pressure is getting because most of the big burger chains now sell veggie burgers and cook their chips in vegetable oil.

Being invited round to friends’ houses isn’t the problem you’d think. Once people know you’re a veggie most parents make an effort. You can help them out by giving a simple suggestion – like popping a veggie ‘meat’ pie in the oven with their food and sharing the veg. If you do finish up with veg alone it’s not a major problem; you’re not going to die.

Friends sometimes – and enemies always – try to pick holes in your beliefs. The funny thing is, everyone thinks they’ve come up with a totally original jibe. ‘I bet you’d eat an animal if you were stranded on a desert island and that’s all there was!’ The answer – ‘Yeah, I probably would, but then I’d probably eat you if you were there’ – may not have much to do with modern meat production but then neither does the question.

From years of experience, I’ve put together a list of the most common and most irritating questions you’re likely to be asked (see pp. 173-7). If this, and all else fails, then just tell them to bog off!

Now for the mega question. Do you snog a meat eater? If you don’t, you might find your choice a bit limited. On the other hand, the veggie perfect person might be just around the corner or at the next club you go to. If you want to meet a veggie male then go where veggie males are more likely to be – local vegetarian, environmental or animal rights groups – and give the rugby-club dance a miss. If you want to meet a veggie female the same kind of rules apply – the only difference is, it’s much easier because there are twice as many veggie females as males.

On the other hand, you could decide to snog meat eaters but convert them. Use all the same techniques as used for parents – videos showing how animals live and die are a must, and you can borrow them from most animal rights or veggie groups. Be strong and insist you only go to those places where you have a choice of things to eat. And it’s perfectly fair to want to go to purely vegetarian places some of the time – maybe even half of the time because your views count as much as theirs.

If partners refuse to budge from their meaty ways, even after you’ve tried everything, then you have a problem and a difficult decision to make. Do you ignore it or give them the elbow? On the other hand, if they respect your views enough to at least eat veggie when they’re with you, you could be on to a winner.

I’ve met some veggies who won’t even talk to meat eaters if they can avoid it. You’re certainly not going to convert anyone to veggiedom that way! And more than one person has converted their partner – I know, I speak from experience!

‘You don’t have to kill to live life to the full. If you or your mates want to go veggie, take it from me it’s a lot easier than you think and a great way to live. And anyway, vegetarians make better snoggers. . .’
- Margi Clarke, actress